What to Expect During Your First Infertility Counselling Session
- Emma Austin
- Apr 13
- 3 min read
Your First Counselling for Infertility Session
Starting infertility counselling can feel overwhelming, especially when you're already navigating the emotional rollercoaster of trying to conceive. Whether you’re considering IVF, donor options, embryo adoption, or grieving pregnancy loss, fertility counselling offers a supportive and non-judgemental space to process what you're going through.
Your first session at Your Story Counselling is always via Zoom or Teams. This allows you to have a session in the comfort of your own home, at a time that suits you. It's convenient, easy and stress-free. A time we can get to know each other and assess if we are the right fit. There is no commitment for a second session if it doesn't
feel right for you.
So, what actually happens during your first session? Here’s what you can expect—and why this first step can be a powerful turning point in your journey.
The First Session: Building a Foundation of Support
Your initial fertility counselling session is often referred to as an “assessment", but rest assured, it’s not a test. It’s a thoughtful, guided conversation designed to help your counsellor understand your experience and how best to support you.
Here are some of the key areas that may be explored during your first session:
1. What’s Your Fertility Story?
Every journey to parenthood is unique. As your counsellor will begin by gently asking you to share your fertility story—what’s happened so far, how it has impacted you, and what you’re hoping for.
“Tell me about your story.”
2. Your Reproductive Goals
What are your goals around family building? Have they evolved over time? This conversation helps you reflect on your hopes, and how you've come to where you are now.
“What are your reproductive goals? Have they always been the same?”
3. How You Make Reproductive Decisions
Infertility often brings difficult decisions—many that are unexpected or brought forward earlier than planned. I may ask about how you and your partner (if applicable) have navigated choices like treatment, timing, and options for family building.
“What has it been like making these decisions?”
4. What Influences Your Experience?
Fertility is more than just a medical issue—it’s symbolic, emotional, and deeply personal. As your counsellor I may explore your family history, health, cultural beliefs, and what parenthood means to you.
“What does it mean to be a parent to you? How has infertility impacted your sense of identity?”
5. How It’s Affecting Your Life
Fertility challenges can affect every area of life. Together, we may explore how infertility is impacting your:
Emotional wellbeing
Relationships
Finances
Career
Physical health
Sex life
Social activities and travel
“In what ways is this experience showing up in your everyday life?”
6. Your Relationship as a Couple
If you're in a relationship, as your counsellor I may ask how you and your partner are coping together. Are you aligned in your hopes and decisions, or navigating differences?
“Are you and your partner on the same page? What does that look like?”
7. Understanding How You Cope
How you’ve received comfort and support throughout your life can shape how you manage distress now. I may gently explore your attachment style and patterns of emotional support.
“Who comforted you as a child? Who do you turn to now, and how do they support you?”
8. The Choices You're Facing
Many decisions in fertility are complex and emotionally charged—about DNA, treatment paths, timing, and more. This is a space to unpack those choices and what they mean to you.
“What decisions are you facing now that you never expected?”
9. Grief and Loss in Infertility
Disenfranchised grief—grief that is not widely recognised—often accompanies fertility challenges. The loss of a dream, control, identity, or expected future can be as intense as physical loss.
“How has this affected your self-esteem, body image, relationships, or sense of security?”
10. What Are You Feeling Right Now?
Infertility can stir up a mix of emotions—sadness, anxiety, anger, stress, shame—and can also show up in behaviours like fatigue, disorganisation, obsessive thinking or mood swings. As your counsellor I will listen not just to your words, but to the emotions beneath them.
“What are you feeling right now?”
Fertility Counselling is a Safe, Personalised Space
There’s no right or wrong way to experience infertility counselling. Whether you’re seeking clarity, emotional release, or guidance through decision-making, your session will be tailored to meet you where you are.
You don’t have to face this journey alone.
Ready to Begin?
At Your Story Counselling, I support individuals and couples navigating the emotional impact of infertility, fertility treatment, pregnancy loss, and alternative pathways to parenthood.
If you or someone you know could benefit from a compassionate space to talk, process, and find support, meet Emma Austin.
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